★ The Underachieving Ovary ★ Launch And Thank You


Just a quick post today to shout: IT’S MY BOOK’S BIRTHDAY!

‘The Underachieving Ovary’ is now live on Amazon. What a journey it’s been.

I also wanted to say thank you: I have more pre-orders on this title than any other ebook so far and have pre-sold a third of the paperbacks. Some of the reviews are already in and they are wonderful. Your support continues to boggle my sleep-deprived porridge bowl of a brain.

Alexandra was pretty pleased, too.

Thank you to VIP reader Ryan Krein for this themed onesie. Amazing!

I can’t WAIT to tell you about my next release (info coming soon). I am so excited about this particular suspense novel, but I’ll fill you in next time.

Just like baby Alex, I’m going to keep this short and sweet. I hope the rest of the week is excellent to you.


★ The Underachieving Ovary ★ September update and pre-order info

I’m thrilled to tell you that ‘Why You Were Taken’ made it into Glamour Magazine. They called it “fast-paced, captivating and imaginative.” As you can imagine, I screamed out loud.

‘The Memory of Water’, free on Amazon, is still number 1 on the UK dark comedy bestseller list, and has had over 12,000 downloads in two months. Mind-boggling!

On the home front, Baby Alexandra is now close to four months old and she’s already helped me launch two books. Maybe that’s why she likes to sleep all the time.

Most recently, she’s been helping me get ‘The Underachieving Ovary’ ready to publish. If she understands the irony of the situation, she doesn’t let on.

                      The Underachieving Ovary
                        On sale 29 September

Does the word ‘endometriosis’ make you want to stick a fork in your eye? No? Then perhaps this book isn’t for you. It’s funny, and (sometimes alarmingly) frank. It contains an impressive array of synonyms for ‘vagina’ and it’s certainly NSFW.
Still not sold? Have a quick read of the excerpt called ‘Project Douche’ that had one reviewer spitting tea out of her nose.

For international readers:
• Pre-order the ebook on Amazon at its special pre-order price of $0.99, or
• Wait to order the POD paperback once it launches on 29/09.

For South African readers:
• Pre-order the Amazon at its special pre-order price of $0.99, or
• Pre-order a signed paperback directly from me.

The special pre-order price for the paperback is R199 (on-sale price is R268).
(Courier delivery is R39. Orders of 3 books or more qualifies for free delivery)

If you are on my VIP readers list, you would have received a freebie — a short story called  ‘Travelling Slacks’. It’s the funniest of the 12 short stories in ‘Sticky Fingers’.

Thank you, as ever, for your support. It means everything to an indie author like me.


Yellow Brick Road

Okay, so I think I just received my Very Last Rejection Letter. Yay?

After loving the self-publishing experience and results of Why You Were Taken, I decided a couple of months ago to go the indie author route with all my future books, but before that, I submitted my (much rejected) infertility memoir manuscript, The Underachieving Ovary, to one last publisher who I thought would be a good match.

I’ve never been happier to get a rejection. I laughed out loud. Especially at the part where the reader found the work “too cheery and upbeat” after my dream agent in the UK found the identical manuscript too dark and “alienating in its intensity”.

Sometimes the way forward is obscure. In my case, the path is as clear as a shiny yellow brick road. And it certainly doesn’t involve traditional publishers.

What I’m Reading: This is the Story of a Happy Marriage


TITLE | This is the Story of a Happy Marriage

AUTHOR | Ann Patchett


ABOUT | A vibrant and moving portrait of love, friendship, work, and the writing life.

WHAT I LOVED ABOUT IT | I found her observations on writing as a profession at once consoling and encouraging.

WHAT I DIDN’T LOVE ABOUT IT | I would have liked more essays on her writing philosophy and process, but that’s just me.

WHO I’D RECOMMEND IT TO | Anyone who appreciates a witty, elegant collection of personal essays.


“The tricky thing about being a writer, or about being any kind of artist, is that in addition to making art you also have to make a living. My short stories and novels have always filled my life with meaning, but, at least in the first decade of my career, they were no more capable of supporting me than my dog was. But part of what I love about both novels and dogs is that they are so beautifully oblivious to economic concerns. We serve them, and in return they thrive. It isn’t their responsibility to figure out where the rent is coming from.”

What I’m Reading: Blood, Bones & Butter


TITLE | Blood, Bones & Butter

AUTHOR | Gabrielle Hamilton


ABOUT | Gabrielle’s unconventional journey through the kitchens she inhabited through the years before opening her acclaimed New York restaurant ‘Prune.’

WHAT I LOVED ABOUT IT | I don’t think I’ve ever read a more authentic, gritty (yet tender) memoir before. In addition to that — she writes so beautifully — Hamilton’s prose deserves a Michelin star.

WHAT I DIDN’T LOVE ABOUT IT | The scene about the rat. It was an important scene and she was right to include it, but I’ve had a nightmare or two since reading it.

WHO I’D RECOMMEND IT TO | Anyone who loves authentic cooking and/or writing, especially if they are interested in Italy and Italian cuisine.

FAVOURITE QUOTE | So many — but here is one from the first chapter (p.7), when she is describing her mother:

She lived in our kitchen, ruled the house with an oily wooden spoon in her hand, and forced us to eat dark, briny wrinkled olives, small birds we would have liked as pets, and cheeses that looked like they might well bear Legionnaire’s Disease.